The Crossover

10 Jul

I only have one friend who knows I blog: KH.

KH and I met over a year ago in Organizational Behavior, a required class for our MBA studies. We didn’t talk much that semester as a kid sat in between us but after discovering we were both taking the same class the following semester, we became fast friends.

Our first hanging out night involved Mexican, two HUGE maragaritas and partying until 4am. Our nights now are more low-key for the most part, but still just as awesome. We laugh all the time. Yes, we are those girls.

Unlike a lot of my friends, KH totally gets me. I don’t feel the need to keep things from her which is why a few weeks after we became friends, I told her I wrote a blog. And, as predicted, she understood my motives writing. Not to say she totally understands the Blog World, because let’s face it, until you’re a blogger, no one really gets the Blog World.

So when Rebekah asked me to go to a Girlfriends Guide to Gaming Party which I’ll write in more detail about once the photos come in, and asked me to bring a friend, KH was the obvious choice. Not to mention I know she loves playing the Wii just as much as I do!

We “pre-gamed,” with some crackers & Laughing Cow cheese, while watching some really interesting/gross show on the Travel Channel about the bizarre foods in faraway lands. (Last night’s country: Ethiopia. I’m sure that if I had grown up in Ethiopia I would love the food but after watching that show I’d say sending me to Ethiopia would be a great way for me to lose weight.) Anyway, I admitted to KH that she would be meeting one of my blog friends, Liz, and for some reason I was nervous. I was officially “marrying” my real life with my Blog World life.

As usual, I had no reason to be nervous because KH and Liz are rather similar in that they are both chill, relaxed, funny women who are easy to be around and both told me, separately, that they’d like to hang out with the other person more which of course makes me happy and I want to plan triple dates and girls’ nights and…. yeah, I like to plan.

I realized on the drive home last night that I have already married my real life and Blog World in a big, big way since Las Vegas, since I started the Blog Love project, since I met Nilsa. Facebook friends. Text messages of encouragement or just because. Email exchanges. Gchat. Snail mail. Phone calls. Planned trips. The crossover is complete.

Funny thing is, though, I’m not ready to tell everone I blog or share my link on my facebook account. I’m not quite ready to be a 100% “known,” blogger. I don’t tell all my friends how I know all my fabulous new friends on Facebook. I’m not sure why I can’t stand up and shout from the rooftops, Yes, I blog! Yes, I share my life on the internet. Maybe it’s because some of the thoughts I share here are hard for me to write. I never know what my readers will think of me. Of my words. Of my life. Maybe it’s because by and large the blogging community is non-judgmental and scrutinizing and maybe it’s because some real life friends are. Maybe it’s because I like to have a part of me that is still marginally prviate from the main stream world. I’m not sure.

All this to say:

a) KH rocks for being a supportive, non-judgemental friend about my online presence (Irish, too! He encourages me to write and keep up with the blog.)
b) there may be a few password protected posts here and there if I’m writing about a super-sensitive topic that I’d die if “real” people found
c) Nintendo DSi’s are pretty sweet and
d) I’m still in shock and awe of all the enrichment blogging has given me

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23 Responses to “The Crossover”

  1. SoMi's Nilsa July 10, 2009 at 12:14 pm #

    I’ve read about a few of these gaming parties. I want in on one, especially if I could hang with a pal like you!

    And those password protected posts? I hope I’m not one of the peeps you want to keep out, because you know I’m gonna come hollering for the password!

    Have a great weekend, Nora! =)

  2. mandy July 10, 2009 at 12:19 pm #

    I have never been able to shout it from the rooftops that I’m a blogger either. I do love blogging though and know that there will come a time with the worlds mesh together. I love how non-judgmental the blog world is and always worry before meet ups that its going to be awkward even though I know that if you’ve made the decision to meet up you already “know” the person. Anyhoo, I am jealous that you were able to go to a Ninetendo party! They sound (and look from other blog posts I’ve seen) fantastic.

  3. Gigi July 10, 2009 at 12:30 pm #

    Oh I am a blogger dropout! I miss it, but I just couldn’t seem to find the time to post, or my stories were to crazy to explain (when using faux names and the like). But, I did meet several wonderful people (yourself included!), and that has made it all worth it. I applaud you for letting real life people in, it’s hard! I enjoy reading your blog, even if I don’t have one myself anymore:)

  4. Amber from Girl with the Red Hair July 10, 2009 at 12:30 pm #

    My blog has always been open because it never occurred to me to be an “anonymous” blogger. When I started blogging, as most bloggers, I really didn’t think anyone read it. Now I have made SO many wonderful blog friends and lately my REAL friends have started commenting. Ones I didn’t even know READ my blogs. My old roommate from college, an old girlfriend from high school. People who found it through my facebook page. They have started commenting and SUPPORTING my writing and it’s great.

    Yes, sometimes I have to censor myself A LITTLE. BUT, for the most part, it’s totally worth it!

    You might be surprised how supportive your friends will end up being :-) XO

  5. Lisa July 10, 2009 at 1:38 pm #

    Sometimes I kind of wish I was anonymous. I know some of my friends read my blog – they never comment, but sometimes they’ll mention that they read something on my blog in conversation, and I get a little bit insecure. Maybe it’s because they don’t comment so I feel like they are reading it and rolling their eyes. I know it’s just an insecurity thing – I just kind of feel more comfortable when fellow bloggers read my blog since I know that they ‘get it’.

    I had my blog on my facebook page for awhile, but then took it down. I just didn’t want everyone that I am friends w/ to be able to access it – some facebook friends are more of an acquaintance.

    I do feel like I definitely hold back & don’t put myself out there like I would if I was anonymous. Which is kind of odd because the friends/family who read it know me very well. It’s weird that I feel more comfortable revealing my deepest thoughts/feelings to strangers, but not to my friends…

    Hmm… something to think about I guess!

    Have a great weekend!

  6. Matt July 10, 2009 at 1:39 pm #

    I’m a total nerd and I completely own it. My whole family reads my blog (which, was weird at first because you know, I can be pretty brash) but now it’s kind of awesome.

    if your friends are really your friends, they will probably like the idea that you are such an awesome blogger.

  7. Chère July 10, 2009 at 2:22 pm #

    I started blogging and I was SO not anonymous! ;) But then I had a weird situation (not about WHAT I was writing or anything like that) and I decided it might be smart to unlink my name and my blog in the Google machine. My friends from college, my sister, selected aunts and uncles and a handful of friends from my day to day life here know I blog and have the link. My blog is available to current students (and professors) at my undergrad. So, I’m “anonymous” but not really. I wouldn’t blog differently at all if I was completely public, except *perhaps* to share more pictures or more about day to day shenanigans. I still wouldn’t name my friends by name (because they didn’t ask to be on my blog)…and I wouldn’t share more personal details. I think there’s a line there somewhere between being open, and realizing that unless your blog is invite-only the people you love are NOT the only people reading and retaining what you put out there. It’s just the way it is. So I try not to make it easy for anybody with ulterior motives to have anything to work with.
    Like you said, unless you are a blogger, it’s hard to understand the Blog World. My friends who know I blog (and may or may not read occasionally) really don’t care that much because they don’t get salacious gossip and they aren’t bloggers.
    I have a handful of blog friends who are becoming “real life” friends on facebook, gchat, etc. and I love it. I count myself blessed to have met so many amazing people, because I *never* imagined it in my wildest dreams when I started blogging so many years ago!
    {sorry for the CRAZY long email, lady! your post was just that provocative I guess :) }

  8. Chère July 10, 2009 at 2:24 pm #

    um, and by email of course I meant comment…geez.

  9. Kyla Roma July 10, 2009 at 3:03 pm #

    Those friends are priceless- I would like to say I have one but… yea, pretty much I don’t. After I changed my blog URL I didn’t tell my friends that I started again other than my best friend who still doesn’t really get it.

    I’m happy with my blog friends knowing who I am in real life, with pictures and video and meet ups etc. because bloggers are real people too. But not all people are bloggers, and if they don’t get it I don’t want their small town comments on my mind =)

  10. Erin July 10, 2009 at 3:07 pm #

    I struggle with this a lot. I have a work friend who blogs and who reads my blog. Most of my friends know I blog, but they don’t read it. I’m just not ready for every person I know reading all about my life. Doesn’t it seem weird, sometimes, that we are willing to share our lives with total strangers, but not people we actually know in real life? I often think my blog friends know me better than my in real life friends.

  11. Margarita July 10, 2009 at 3:24 pm #

    My sister knows about my blogging, but I don’t tell a lot of my friends. Many of my friends just aren’t into that kinda world/life/blogging/writing thing, they either won’t get it, or they’ll scrutinize my writing so it takes on a different and likely negative meaning. What’s the point?

    My words, my thoughts, my readers who share, discuss, opinionate, who look at things objectively because they really don’t know ME. Slowly coming out, not against it, but if I do meet someone who I feel at ease with I’m sure I would tell them.

    BF knows, he doesn’t mind, he thinks I’m a dork, but so is he! lol… Anyway, enough of the rambles, YAY YOU!! lol, have fun at that party!! I’ve seen other ones online that are similar, I wish I could go to one too!

  12. butterflycharlie July 10, 2009 at 5:32 pm #

    “let’s face it, until you’re a blogger, no one really gets the Blog World.”

    so true! I’m still delving into it all ( a year and a half of blogging myself) but there are things I know bloggers would understand that other people wouldn’t. Only 3 people I know, know that I blog but you’re right, if other people found out i would DIE. I’ve slipped the mask quite a few times but I’m not searchable so its all good! Right?!

  13. rebekahj81 July 11, 2009 at 9:39 am #

    I’m a lot less anonymous now than I was when I started. It just seems like a natural progression once you start meeting people behind the blogs you read. They let you in, you let them in. I don’t think I’ll ever have a blog with my last name and exact place of business and details about the neighborhood in which I live, but I think most of us feel that way. Safety first!

    I’m so glad I got to meet you and KH. Meeting “real” people out of blogland is so fun.

    There are still some people who either don’t know I blog or know that I do and do not have the URL. My boyfriend is one of them, my parents are as well. My mom and dad are just a little too close for comfort, especially because I write about E. And E himself doesn’t care that he doesn’t read it because:
    1. He hates to read, and
    2. He knows I tell him pretty much everything anyway.

  14. andhari July 11, 2009 at 10:18 am #

    I know how you feel, we dont want all of our real life friends or acquintances know us too much if they read our blogs. Blogging isnt popular for all people and even the idea of it is sometimes frowned upon.

  15. E.P. July 11, 2009 at 2:15 pm #

    I know how you feel about the letting everyone know you blog. I’m the same way. But blogging has been SUCH a blessing in my life. Isn’t it nice to have a little crossover?

    I hope I get to see you sometime soon!

  16. tbrooke July 12, 2009 at 5:37 am #

    i still haven’t ventured into letting my “real life” people know about my blog. i just feel like its somewhat of a journal where people can throw in comments and advice & i enjoy that…but i feel it could get far too messy otherwise.

    speaking of real life contact…i enjoyed the pleasant surprise of our gchat the other day! hope you are enjoying a fantastic weekend <3

  17. emrlds July 12, 2009 at 9:50 am #

    seriously, this has been how my brain was thinking all this week. i have my first “crossover” event with realy life and bloggy friends coming up and i’m kind of weirded out by it. real life knows i have A blog, but hasn’t ever read it. i’m glad your crossover worked out for the best. =)

  18. Kimmers July 12, 2009 at 4:14 pm #

    This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately too. From the moment I started my blog, I’ve blogged under my real name, posted pics of myself, etc… but I’ve only told my bf and my bff about the blog. I don’t think I censor myself any differently than I would if everyone in my life read it, because I’ve always written knowing that anyone could find it at any time. Still there’s something really final about telling everyone. Also I think you reach a point where if you do tell someone, it’s sort of weird that you didn’t tell them sooner. And even though I don’t write anything that I would die for my mom to read… still I find myself not sharing it with her. Like you said, really? Only bloggers “get” blogging.

    That being said, I just started the process of linking my blog to my facebook page. I figure, I put all this time and energy into my blog, I might as well own it, right? (Does not mean I won’t be fairly panicked the first time my fb page announces that I’ve written a new post!!)

  19. ceecee July 12, 2009 at 6:19 pm #

    *sigh* The only “real” person who knows I blog is the fiancé. I’m scared of telling those who are close to me…so right now, I haven’t tied my real life to my blog life. I like my little home on the internet.

    KH sounds like a great friend, and an awesome supporter, so I do wish you the best with your friendship!

    PS >> I want a Nintendo DS so bad.

  20. AuburnKat July 12, 2009 at 7:24 pm #

    I know exactly what you mean! My blogging friends are becoming my real life friends. When I go and meet them I always get asked by how I met them…I usually say oh from college or I met them while I was living in KS or AR…that usually does the trick.

    I’m definitely not ready to share that I blog either with most of my friends that I did not meet from blogging…

  21. Jessica July 12, 2009 at 8:11 pm #

    I definitely hear you. My bloggy friends have become my real life friends too. My friends know I blog but I don’t really publicize it as much as I used to. If you know me and I trust you, I’ll tell you about it, but I don’t publicize it as much. I’m glad you’re MY bloggy friend!!

  22. brookem July 13, 2009 at 11:29 am #

    im going to one of these nintendo parties in a couple weeks! and then having a gap one of my own! so much fun!
    i know what you mean about the blogging. im also not ready to share it all via facebook… but i think that’s okay. it’s our own little community here. you’ll know if and when you’re ready to shout all about it.

  23. Larissa July 18, 2009 at 2:34 pm #

    I know exactly how you feel about the blog world/real life world. I try to make sure few real life friends know about my blog only because my writing becomes restricted. (my blog killed one of my potential relationships ugh)

    these gaming parties sound like a lot of fun! cant wait to see the photos!

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