For BelleRenee…

24 Jul

…as part of her Virtual Bridal Shower

The lovely Erin put this special event together for one of my (newest!) most sincere, hilarious, honest and beautiful blog friends, BelleRenee. Since we couldn’t all gather together to throw her a shower, there’s no better way to celebrate her upcoming nuptials than with a Virtual Shower, right? You can view a list of all the bloggers who participated on Erin’s blog.


Okay, so we know I’m not married so clearly offering my own marriage advice is not possible. Thanks to the vast internet I found some great tidbits of wisdom that I thought I’d share since it struck a chord with me:

* Always try to outdo each other in kindness, that way you are concentrating on the positive

* Remember your vows and remember that often we don’t know we’re making a mistake unless we are told so speak up without being rude and hurtful.

* The secret of a happy marriage is a short tongue (or so they say).

* Marriage should not be so much about looking at each other but looking in the same direction together. I believe the message from this is to remember the positive things that brought you together and then to concentrate on positive goals to achieve as a couple.


* Marriage is not always 50/50. Some days you will wake up and may have to give 90% and your spouse will give 10%. Other days you may wake up and give 25% and your husband will have to put in the 75%.


(Source for the tidbits above is here.)
  A bit of marriage advice you may want to share with your husband-to-be, from Dustin Hoffman:


And lastly, I have several of Kahlil Gibran’s poems taped to my fridge because of the intense, raw emotion I feel when I read his words so I’m sharing this one I found from him with you:


Thoughts on Marriage

You were born together, and together you shall be forever more.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your
Yes, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness.
And let the winds of heaven dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love.
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but each one of you be
alone–even as the strings of a lute are alone though the quiver
with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not in each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the Cyprus grow not in each other’s shadows

– Kahlil Gibran

And now for the cheese!
Wishing you and your man nothing but the best in life, Renee. I know from the way you talked about him in Vegas, eyes dancing and mouth unable to resist smiling, that this man makes you incredibly happy and full of joy. Enjoy all the days leading up to the wedding and all the days after. Speaking as an infinite bridesmaid, I know that weddings can be stressful but just remember that what doesn’t get done for the wedding, doesn’t matter. The small (or big) details will not change the meaning of your union together in the eyes of your friends, family and most especially, between you and your husband.

Many hugs and of course, best wishes for a lovely marriage,



11 Responses to “For BelleRenee…”

  1. Kyla Roma July 24, 2009 at 6:49 am #

    Very well put Nora, and I love the Dustin Hoffman post! lol That explains SO much… poor mister, I didn’t realize he must be so scared! ;) Happy wedding, Renee!!

  2. ria July 24, 2009 at 6:58 am #

    love the poems, they are very emotional and intense. congratulations Renee :)

  3. mandy July 24, 2009 at 7:01 am #

    What a beautiful poem, Nora!

    Congrautlations, Renee!

  4. Megan/SomewhatVoluble July 24, 2009 at 7:30 am #

    Great advice. It’s SO TRUE that some days, you have to give more than you get … but it all balances out in the end.

    Patience is definitely key in a marriage.

  5. Erin July 24, 2009 at 7:59 am #

    I love this post! The advice, Dustin Hoffman, the poems…it’s all fabulous! Congrats to Renee!

  6. bellerenee July 24, 2009 at 8:43 am #

    “Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.”
    That gave me goosebumps. Nora, from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU for all your kind words and our friendship.

  7. Chère July 24, 2009 at 12:38 pm #

    What a lovely tribute! I love the poem!

  8. andhari July 24, 2009 at 2:22 pm #

    The poem is amazingly beautiful , I love Kahlil Gibran. This might be one of the best ones I’ve read today in the virtual bridal shower you ladies throw for Renee :)

  9. ceecee July 26, 2009 at 8:54 am #

    That’s very sweet of you. Doesn’t matter if you’re not married (yet), it’s the thought that counts. Your poems were great. :)

  10. E.P. August 6, 2009 at 11:41 pm #

    Aww, Nora! This is so sweet! I teared up reading it.

    Lovely writing, lady! I wish you could be there this weekend.


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